This is hard, life is crazy
This is tough, I got lazy
Can I even recover?
It’s my fault
I believe the wrong things
I get guilt
But Usually I can put it to flames
Sometimes I forget who is to blame
It’s that guy down there giving you shame
Don’t look down this is no game
Look up for this isn’t in vein
But let’s just say I had it a little harder
People think I’m a lot smarter.
Y’all thought I was bright
I’m a dark soul
I lost my light
I’m too dull
Started up the burning
Started fanning the flames
Hard hearted turning
Hard hearted shame
No one to blame
Yeah im one In the same
It’s habitual
Scary but spiritual
Couldn’t even fight it lyrical
The way I been seeing is super sophistical
Possibly umbilical
Should I cut me some slack
maybe it wasn’t me
Crazy train running off the tracks
I didn’t know who to believe
I was blinded by a thin veil
of knowledge
Pounding on my head like a nail—throbbing
I didn’t know it was wrong at first
it was The worst
Panic and fear
I didn’t know what to do
Should I just become a new
A New person maybe some support too?
Maybe I should kneel down and beg through
The power of god growing out of you
I don’t know
Don’t look at me
Get on your knees
See you arms folded up
Look to your god and ask what sup
Say your sorry and apologize
If you don’t nobody’s gonna hear your cries.
Couldn’t see my light oh forget it I’m so bright now you feel it
you better hide
Under you covers
Away from others
Move out of my way
Grab your mothers
This light grows
I lit the coals
Show me your support
Show me your pulls
Let me see all your reports
These first songs are very basic, not organized and a lot of chaos. But words I wrote will always be appreciated. They matter no matter how confusing they are. This song was my first attempt at writing my emotions, it was clearly a little uncomfortable experience. I wasn’t used to it and it wasn’t really smooth and clear. You can see how the song moves like a roller coaster and it at the time was how I felt. I hold this close to my heart and hide it deep in my soul.